The Lip Smacking Truth

Dear Lip smacking Brother,
         I know we have gotten along all these years and we have had our differences but for the most part we are real pals now. But you still have not changed the one quirk that still sets me on edge. Your loud tendency to let everyone else in the vicinity that you are enjoying something delicious. Let it be finger licking, slurping, plate licking, open mouth crunches, or any other auditory sign that you are eating I just can't stand it. Now I understand that somethings are really tasty but show some decency to the rest of us around and keep it to your self. I mean we don't live in a barn and eat out of trough. We have civilized utensils and manners that do have a purpose in a house and should be used. More than once I have eaten my cereal in the living room while you are in the kitchen chomping down your own cereal to beat the band. This is not a big thing to ask, just keep your mouth closed and try not to be so vigorous in your eating. It would be much appreciated by many and plus, you need to learn some etiquette before you leave the house so start now.
Thanks,
Your big brother